House or Home?
- corneliusmary
- Jun 11
- 2 min read
I’ve been thinking a lot about house vs. home recently. With Misha and the boys in Japan for almost two weeks, Mike and I have had the house to ourselves. Well, with Luna the dog. The house feels like a house, not a home.
Mike and I have lived together in eleven different residences. Some were small and basic. Others were large and, although not elegant, well-furnished by most standards. Some felt like home. Others like houses. The sentiment had nothing to do with the standard of the build.
Our current house was purchased and renovated for one purpose: to share with Misha and the boys. For reasons too complex to discuss here, I have never liked the house, but it has served its purpose rather well. This test, the kids out of town, has helped me see how home is more than the building itself. And it isn’t just the place where the family is. Home provides safety and nourishment for the bodies, but also nourishes the soul. Each member of the family should feel complete as well as a part of the whole.
Sharing a house with multi-generations with each person at a different stage of life challenges the house to provide the spaces for personal growth. My own example: I rarely play the piano, the instrument sitting in the middle of the common area interrupting other activities. Practicing is a solo endeavor: it is difficult to concentrate on the music and technique when others are nearby, listening and occasionally trying to sing along. That is just me. I imagine each of us has a sacrifice to claim.
I think back on the places we have lived, the places I loved, the places which were simply shelter. The ones I loved suited our family well for the time we spent there. Those which were simply shelter, lacked features needed to nourish our physical and/or emotional needs.
Finding the right house is more than finding the right location and adequate space. Your checklist of wants and needs dissolves when you walk in and your gut tells you: this is Home.
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